More Than I Deserve

I have had some time to reflect some more on my tour. I have been thinking about the "Support Our Troops" stickers and magnets you see all over. Even though they are going the way of the "Baby On Board" signs, the support I have received these last nine months needs some re-addressing.

None of you would be reading this blog had it not been for Gregg from Texas. One of my best friends, married to one of my other best friends, he urged me to write about the tour. Gregg, although against the war and the current administration, has been a tremendous help, even though he thinks cookies, CDs, and comics are small things. I look forward to seeing Christine and Gregg and holding them once again.

The support from work has been outstanding. Packages, emails, and being kept "in the loop" reminded me that I was missed and expected back in the office to continue to do that job I love so much. It helps, I suppose, that the job is an Army ROTC program and that most of my co-workers are all in the military. However, the office went two officers short last year because of deployments and had to cover the same material with less personnel. Thank you, Sir.

I need to thank Stacey, Sam's mom, and her family who did a great job keeping me informed of Sam's ups and downs over the school year. Stacey allowed Lisa to spend time with Sam so that the two of them could develop their own special relationship. Stacey made sure Sam sent me letters, cards, and artwork to cover my walls in my room. The deployment was easier knowing that Sam was okay.

My family did a great job keeping in touch. Mom did her best to hide her fear and worry from me and dad actually used a computer! Andy, Mare, Lucas, and Alyssa entertained Sam on several occasions to keep her connected to the family.

Over the last nine months I have been able to get to know Lisa's family. Betty sent me wonderful cards and letters with pictures attached. She is a lively spirit who still enjoys being involved in life. Linda, Mark, Kira, and Grace have taken the time to make me feel like part of the family and I am deeply appreciative.

For everything everyone has written, sent, or done in some way to support me, thank you.

However, I could not gotten through this deployment without Lisa. Lisa has been my refuge, my rock, and my link to the life I long to return to. Thanks to Instant Messaging, I have been able to "come home" to her at the end of my day and share in the frustration, anguish, and success that I had that day. I have found myself laughing and smiling at the computer screen on more than one occasion - sometimes with her, sometimes at her, sometimes at me.

Lisa and I continued to grow and build on a relationship that started on a solid foundation. We avoided the longing, sorrowful messages of missing one another during the long mid-tour months. Instead we shared and answered questions on what our relationship would be like in the near and far future. We wrote of ideas, and desires, and dreams that we could achieve together. We wrote of children, work, money, vacations, and all of the good things that come when two lives are shared. We wrote of handling the hard times and how we would find strength in one another and God.

In the end Lisa became the ideal of returning home. Being separated for more than six months she took on a mythical quality. She existed in a world that I wanted to be in. Her face graces my walls and my computer and looking into those eyes I can find refuge and solace. She provided me the comfort I needed after a long day from her life thousands of miles away. She reminded me that I was loved beyond words and that love would be even more real in person that over email, IM, or satellite phone.

She is more than I deserve and I know that every day. I cannot wait to be in her arms again. The anticipation gives me goosebumps.